I Will Find You

Joanna Connors

Joanna Connors was a 30-year-old newspaper reporter when she was raped. In the aftermath, she became afraid of everything – flying, driving, riding in a car while someone else drove. After she had children, she hovered over them constantly fearful for whatever might happen to them as well. But then, when her daughter was 16, Joanna began to confront the fears that had been ruling her life.

Joanna’s prose moves with the propulsive energy of a thriller, as she investigates the biggest story of her life. Her investigation leads her into the past as she looks back at the attack itself and how it was handled by the police, prosecutors, the courts and by her family and colleagues and how the fear and shame she tried so hard to deny remained, casting its shadow over so much of her life. From there, her investigation leads her forward to surprising discoveries, encounters with unforgettable characters, and sometimes into dangerous situations.

Reviews of I Will Find You

  • ‘Brutally affecting. Connors’ story illustrates how inextricably our lives – and those of our children – are entwined with the lives of others’ Guardian

    ‘(An) unflinching, riveting memoir…Spare, lucid and even funny at times, this account of learning to live with suffering is nothing short of haunting’ Mail on Sunday

    ‘Challenging, moving . . . Connors takes a hard look at assumptions we make about victims and perpetrators’ Sunday Times

    ‘Deeply humane and harrowing’ Boston Globe

    ‘Magnificent, necessary, unflinchingly honest’ Jon Krakauer

    ‘Raw, compelling, deeply affecting’ Polly Vernon

    ‘Is it possible to call the story of a violent rape and its haunting aftermath a thing of beauty? This lucid, powerful memoir becomes its own form of redemption, as a seasoned reporter turns her gaze on her own life and that of her rapist’s. A profoundly moving, important and, yes, beautiful book’ Dani Shapiro, author of STILL WRITING

    ‘The most important book on rape since Susan Brownmiller’s AGAINST OUR WILL. Honest and strong, riveting and terrifying, heartbreaking and utterly unsentimental. This book will change lives and minds’ Mary Doria Russell, author of THE SPARROW

    ‘A hard-to-read book that is impossible to put down. I am in awe of Connors’s courage and inspiring compassion. A testament to the power of forgiveness and a hard-earned grace’ Thrity Umrigar, author of THE SPACE BETWEEN US

    ‘A sobering, masterful, and meticulously researched exploration of the crime but with a twist: Connors plumbs the depths of her attacker and the culture of violence that made him a rapist. Understanding radiates from every page in prose that is crisp and full of unexpected notes of grace’ Beth Macy, New York Times bestselling author of FACTORY MAN